meowtrains
“You have a lot of different fragments of personality that seem to kind of come out at bizarre times and then completely dominate who you are. I’ve boiled it down to about three parts in my head-- there's a vague, philosophical, sage motherfucker bit that just kind of locks me out of the conversation. I mean, I can't speak for anyone else, but you'll just decide to slap some theory on me and I basically have to just go "huh" until you come out of it. Then there's intimidating/inviting you. you try to talk to me and at the same time I am trying to navigate around your emotions so I don't A. piss you off or B. have you turn into your 3rd weird persona, depressed as hell paranoid needy Kayla. This is usually the one where you talk about how much your boyfriend hates you and you hate your life and shit sucks and I basically have to try and console you, which is almost impossible because you're smarter than me. these things together make it difficult to talk to you, because you're inconsistent and I almost never know how you'll react to something, and as I hold your opinion is scarily high regard, I am hesitant to share ideas or opinions with you for fear of you slingshotting into some shit like this. It isn't a bad thing, per se, but it takes a lot of energy to talk to you because of having to be on my toes, and messaging you is a four-hour commitment”
...Gee, thanks.
