Notes
i wanted so badly to be loved
i wanted so badly to be loved
ẘ̶̜̈́̊̀h̘̹̣̹ͮa̴̝̻͈̞͎͊̅̐̚ṫ͖̣̤̠̘̀ ̵y̟̳̖̟͍̬ǫ̦̺̱̩̲̯ͧ̒ṵ͈̲̖̖͕͊͐ͪ̆ͩ͌̓ ̖̈́̎͛̎ͮ̚d̑̅̾̚͡i͊͐ͤ͗ͣ͊͊҉̪̙͔̟̗͚̙d̳̰̦ ̰ͫͩ͗̍t͓̭̬̥͉̣̥ͥ̍̀͑̇oͦ͂ͮ ͈̬͎̪̮͟m̡̈́̿ͭ̾ͬ̒ͤe̹̳̠̘͉͋̍ͭ̚ͅ ̘̖̹̄̑ͅw̫͖̣a̛̱̯ͭ̔̄̿s͙̗̙͚͑̏̽̐̌ͣ̃ ͧ͏͖̞̣̣̳̤n̰̫̬̼̹͓ͫ̄̏ͅo̢̩͍̙͒t͇̦̮̟̿͛ͣͦ̿́ͮ͠ ̘̙̩͇͓͕̭̈̎͊͘ļ̖ő͕̜̺̒v̢̗̻̇ͮͥͪ͆̈́̚e̴̳̝͇͎̯̲͑ͤ̊̈́
̯͈͙̫̍̓̄̉̌ͅͅ
4 comments on babydo҉ll ̧̀
xanlion November 21, 2016
I understand your irritation, then. Sorry so many people romanticize/sexualize these kinds of things on tumblr and throughout the internet, and it makes it confusing. Best wishes!
⃠victimized November 21, 2016
@Xeire yeah of course i know exactly where you're coming from. meeting those kinds of people and being exposed to direct sexualization of the very thing that traumatized me has made me literally sick on multiple occasions. But there's no sort of that behavior here. I'm still haunted and wounded by these experiences; I wouldn't dream of ever following or condoning that behaviour. Thanks for understanding!
⃠xanlion November 20, 2016
Alright. hope you find a different way to cope eventually, it isnt cool to put an aesthetic on it
⃠victimized November 21, 2016
@Xeire this is by no means putting an aesthetic to it???? i am a trauma victim and survivor, and this affects me in every minute of every day. To cope with my own pain I make these mixes as relief from my fear, guilt, shame, and pain. I have a few more I've made on my account. I'm by no means romanticizing my experiences, these are uploaded to my own account for my own relief. It isn't cool to assume that I'm trying to make a horrifying aspect of my childhood some tumblr aesthetic. My trauma was a horrible thing, and I will get through it how I feel is in my own best intrest. Thanks for your input though.
⃠victimized November 21, 2016
@Xeire on top of that, these mixes (this one and my other CSA/abuse related vent pieces) have been beneficial to my own mental health and others who want to vent. 8tracks doesn't exist in a bubble, and people make mixes for reasons outside of aesthetic. Please don't reprimand survivors on how they deal with their experiences unless it directly harmful to someone. Thanks.
⃠nullify May 06, 2022
@victimized @xanlion Im proud of you. its not easy but im glad your making strides to being comfortable with yourself and your using music to do so. ignore the others.
⃠xanlion November 17, 2016
You alright?
⃠victimized November 20, 2016
@Xeire i've got C-PTSD and other traumatic disorders from it so nah but thanks for checkin lmao
⃠xanlion November 17, 2016
Child sexual abuse? what the fuck?
⃠victimized November 20, 2016
@Xeire yeah this is a coping mix when i was sexually abused as a child. exactly as it says on the tin.
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