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I Identify myself as the sun. Ever since I was young I dreamed of slamming hydrogen isotopes into each other to make helium & light and send it through the galaxy. People say to me that a person being a star is Impossible and I’m fucking retarded but I don’t care, I’m beautiful. I’m having a plastic surgeon inflate me with hydrogen and raise my temperature to over 6000 °C. From now on I want you guys to call me “Sol” and respect my right to give you vitamin D and probably skin cancer. If you can’t accept me you’re a fusionphobe and need to check your celestial privilege. Thank you for being so understanding

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